A bloom of negative love ?? love destroys me poetry toils and soils one can get lost in waves of destruction as a blessed feat of thwart beauty, angst is a hoarder, in order to have it – at all ?? withhold as a behavior seeking to control it ??
Why cant defeat the runaway ?? yes yes its a dreamers paradise. but to say that – isnt enuff. barely touches on the beauty in negation that I got caught up with as proof of adhering after purity searching for a unity of truth – when all hell breaks lose and falls top and bottom into hells covered ditch with death and lust.
Reading book on Robert Lowells going nuts. having another wing with him-mmmmm, as I have had before. hes land ho gutteral hungry. poetry clings to whalers stinking sinking linking ships rampage bold and hungry with every clarity equivalence. his poetry and manics had a violently mysterious interrelationship for him. he worked best in just that region it appears before searching wilderness overtook his leaky sanity. girl delinquent says: dont suffer As Much methinks from manly manics – as a girls veiled hysteria – but that is untrue with the religious stuff –
Decision: to seek after knowledge of depth of senses that comes up through planks of theatrical thinking, which has as must an element of the Playful, this – the serious one says, rather than going only the lonely where beauty and horror, drips up gloating head scarf blind with mourning, purity is fatal –
Sartre went thru the unity thing – had manics too (especially towards the end), was speed freak. Lowell went through raging rigorous purity thing for sure, me did those too, and also the girl-be-damned a hungry lobster is a wretched forlorn hungry fool.