Working thru rot divide or unmodify — quiet here as mouse house with faust. Today — peace and gud tidings — mine only true one absolute weather support the work to find its own destiny in la langue — was strange to be fat way — body wanted diff life — sylvie s on dreaming into being — so many every boxtop —the imago far as can go bangs on about — low as can hoe — curiosity hingry and terror and timid — blotchy buggy soggy tiered — then reach out seemingly umbillically to other worders birders — and bounders to absorb mirror cul and meth thud and exchange rats and ratios and rations fah who boo knew ❤️❤️ — those who permet me become be livd on art part cart liberal — theres a one track hack evil button in la langue — find alone is “very” disarming — so guess seek the other to make wayway thru — not wanting to disrupt as bends my curve to breaking points which blow mouse house down -/ but black hole mmm engine too -/ new story finding chloe — let it sneek off into abso lutes ?? And others arrive to arg the vousdo back then dress in a n weave patterns glut slut means tooo seeking a grace — finding beauty and disaster and chuckles the misxmaker somebody — all but “resistance boxacrackers” want “share tea with v.”
es — Mmmmmy lyf small — but the work is getting “tight” yah — not doing any of this to burst at feet but jess stand up even say “ullo” — perhaps eod if can get loggers at factory to flesh it out fully — pea haps then wriding itself cud out go the shrimpy — all can do iszzz kip hoing -/ litter ex ists in black box of pie heavens no nothing assume everything — motto my grotto — SafeStreetsUSA
Na knot ankcore — but flow t twas 2 stay a flo te — naught pulled all wayway under again ana again — by waves of the sw eat hell o of m add ness — peace enuff in heart to “see” as a general way of perceiving purr suing ex changing litter n fill — tho still get caught in patterns of mis tea rious reasoning — on hole humor serves thru process of “finding” the serious — in laden and loaf, and peaches in trees —
Cud not have gotten pie to piece of peace on this without leaning towrs of pizza — mindbidysoul roll in the “hole” — looking fig out maintain mid grnd ( instead of yaknow burning man grnd zrro) endless love online works perfecta emmy pammy saus gd2go vousdo ruespew hippped make out a motionless meadured and absorbing caze para wick — now in the fic ?? Make up own version what fic is — ?? Hmm now is whispy moany inelegant — starting back on fiction — raise under surface to a dimension of what hmmm
Just did a fa$h sketch from agent s bern approved — tooooday way heavy dev/y hi end drawing class prep sat at 1 -/ also about finding line – focus pocus — that round 1000 pie hi happy fingers number sum in can with fannand pans collecting nuggera — the knocks the pix and the fizzies — to the slippery edges of wipperwood — i know its frig it fright height bite night reading a la rob the bin hood — tooooo also do fiction — something go back for ? // please says the beez blet bluzz earotic nuts and way the doodle noodle hoody poodle canoodle and nuts for guts — peepoe ddeafylocks pox and frisson and say hello for real as a V — edgr of gorest always waves and yells yo join her at the milk bar fizz wizz and hup comes the resistance — loopp fuck rrrrttt /- hu go not but -/ jack the riphuh pulling petals off poppy — oh hate city oh are wars between screamers // who cross dada pts with marcel -/ hate pushes back hate isa great pocus focus -/ yet/just anutter moon flitter with death — and make way gor day — which due too heavy river syvvy heloise in church — betty lost ton of cup cakes in garbage of golden ruins — is a bird born wasteland happiness deformrd — still living faithfully on hump over at circuitous dump -/ collecting presh tin — hmm – to take from proncess to dimples on the dump in 666.
abandoned to balance // new thing !! As shocking contempt desire to burn baby burn (the camille) — turns back to skin reality girls skin n some of caves stuff/it vs love — sudden openness to gentleness under neath doubling in — now think about it — addressing gruesome and beauty — acute awareness fold finds punter (compliment — double for trouble) where surges hard against soft (in led belly bottom draw er)— My barn acle sill fill hem with emmm — writing itself being inside a closeness of loop — when focus consumes carni and vortex in can —- sozzles on the nozzles (as jingles from joker under cut with car toon mis makinghmmm ) — tho to and fro the blood of beauty is jesus defiant — if that makes any sense the moment expels into the visionary with descents into ascendance — Yes am stuffed thank yall for the love of it -/ #nickcavelovesongs #nickcave #shanemacgowan #slavojzizek
Beauty and gruesome — the way ugliness as a shock as willingness to crash against waves of contempt that circled real and religiously —- body of my dreams — umm much like the litter — a closed loop — kafkiiibibi and the buckett I think had thingy bingeys about closed loop cycles ? — feminity too soo condemned as an existence when small — tried to cut it out of me — blood dreams enveloped the sacrifice — except for one thing — clothes — da — horded the shocking and transgressive — who loved endlessly — like love of god, as scatter of bones — any bone could suddenly come back to life — but only existed inside my closed loop wasn’t allowed “out” and anything coming in was not real was enveloped by what was there not other way around — real didnt come into it till “the mad thingy bingey” where poets as vehicles to its extensions became a part of the thing itself drew me out to see it — the closed loop in a way defied reason but that wasnt that crucial at first, defining reason grew out of it, remember thinking about that clearly and at times angrily rejecting reason as absolute codifier — of course now have studied confronting edges of reason (dr. No) as per math -/ but consciousness crossing out of consciousness — loved crossing that “line” — savored rather as do the free writing, that line where image explodes into fetching reaches, as a thingy bingey — Discussions had that were without formable words /- just clumps of accumulating sense data or something, again kind of like free writing doubling in and out — the miracle mumbles mm — still have them edges of sleep all the time //// free 2b u and me #myhappywheels — clumsy = mereology — parts against the whole hmmm — poetry goes there under line otto earotically because the erotic is entry into thinking outside of time, transgressing strict figures of obligation up against horror and a perfusion of sacrifice beauty in a dream freed itself from struggles with conformity tho trained seals of virtues sin into skin preempted and killed that lie again and again — erotic cascades into its exponential time travel criss crossing time periods as a sumptuous vanishing into splendors that loop with death —
Sheherazade to the gallows glowing sadness — with a fiddle — naughty parker in pit of fear dances a sad billiwing fall onto knife— heist of death from image elevates the indy— individual independence — still reading — will send perfume decided artwork penises with wings artschool style —/ hm which piece ? Writing is getting pretty decent as brave fend of the mobius morbid flush — and still love is endless —/ ohenry gift of the magi — gifts sacrifice seeming wasted but proof of love — Happy wheels annoying sister theories of love and death -/ get that cow out to louis past her — ❤️❤️ bataille calls them the 10000 cuts where the thief tied to stick like jaysus each villager gets to thrust a dagger thru and he is in a dying ecstasy !! ascending genet would say through clouds of glory -/ but the moi has learned to float vehicle attached yet detached — yes with my happy wheels ❤️❤️— know pisses yall off — however hard eye work — have not been able get sendy wendy to step up — there is nothing but the black box — and thats a closed loop and brings nothing to fold for yall beyond gruesome moily tethers — its vacuum sucks me in and sucks me out -/
Sherry baby !!! Writing on line — where it all started — sites a mess already — under notebooks free writing issues — let loose sheherazade -/ she and emmy are in garden on their backs under sun — talking to trees — have 2 more to read — teaching tonight gotta prep —
Dyu think overedit? Gonna start thinking about how much edit down sometimes think go too far —- ecstatics evil earliest retrievals cording to books venture comes frm not eating from hunger iz a buzz builder — same with sleep deprivations — used to “honor” them -/ the depri buzz — never met anyone talk to bout them except in books — buzzbilders comes from trading seals that makes no known sense — stall falls deps?? Fall always hell — sys on other side why fall thing — do as pop off of camus lou — man i wd like to do that — do a dunk off saved notes and steam in baudell”air edge of cliff with rock and bring in the resistors as beauty rocking with evil — ? Evil as not real (greeks about infinity being without limit — > ugly, existentialism without presence —> ugly— hmm church medieval made pretty? ) — as its worried over in math too — edges of real and not real and me always well yall seen me shaking apart — the being there thing -/ as some kind of quantity of some kind of license not to stop — here cahnt make tru Lynn stop loving it — for writing !! wd it help me est balance iz always the wonder everyone seems to say yes and no — its just time not a nutshell of the infinite skiptomuddarlimgs breathless — changing phone muse — #afternoonmuses shd go to #met talk to the animals.
Its a wonderful life if you can find it. Nick Cave
Distance creates camouflage. And love creates beauty duty jealousy treachery u name it. Still there is a hunger art allows — submits itself too. Seems to have a discussion with — as self and beyond self — about what it is and what it does and how/why — from #albertcamus to #nickcave. Even while doing it — which I find ardent in an equivalence that penetrates it — and is not aquaphobic is not loth at being liberal.
Happiness as a place of rebellion -/ existentialism where nothingness and performance are In dialogue?!? align a kind of suspension bearing face to every filter -/ and camus in full consequence of and response ability for charfully bearing rocks // pig peg for negs rock in scks — not to go all Grapefruit -/but szizzers cant 👋 eye cark a lark and cutty sark for arc -/ nothing ness and deathums beckettd — oh bracktd -/ participating in chair treasure ! Sam Mule seemingly psses off to me — working thru sa langue /did row // as a fun de mentaller — bow to fill — for throwing “the die elective” into bitters with soda and bone — simmerhow thru jj feel for philo is potty — philo fermoy has a theatrical rhetorical beaver lever weaver — with p lists — whereas moi (and sometimes chair lui) — springs the things via The Vivaldi Code — the impact for emily is a sympa knee —
Study craft a lot alot — z attribs munde melding retro active precursor ing with kafkas ways and means —
techniques astral porjections by Crookall.
what lies on in behind image // listening for it allowing it in \\ very dangerous at crossroads — must be in for long haul -/ solves nothing — i found — but in pursuit knowledge as reckonings with structure of ideas -/ incroyable
You will learn at your own expense that in the long journey of life you will encounter many masks and few faces”
Luigi Pirandello, from the novel One, no one, and a hundred thousand
Free rider writer, first 3 pages look wonderful — penguin publishes her and new directions. #steviesmith #theredhandfiles
Must find discipline —.focus I have — start rewrite today — weave it b. Tons of stuff in that one — yet on some measure barely comprehensibl. Dig back thru where were you. P.S. drunk will always be looking for drink be cause. Cull it an inyerview. Started new thing called pynch on ordering. Back of mind moving forward thar she blows. Focus of Luv (for lit shit) broader now—- still at times itches and burns like beautiful fungus. Also dress a few mannequins haha — not trying to be like pyn just weave of be with punch at top of epingle — dipster logic — poppa up about owning nothing of your own in ticklish -/ the Dead Already section in ticklish — negs and limits section oooo — section out the haute —depths of bath in blud — le couers beauty inbred like horror and cutting off tongues— how many stories u know men got tongues cut off ZEro-/ but to get over dead heap ing with it —- rule of the mule — pulls my throat at rope of others — for their drag—conceived at Some Measure as a logical form of luv and — if brought me discipline — tuff too sad admits bad at it — triggers laps with feathers and heaters as contractive of scope — barely man edge with out hep -/ and so on it goes — v for vie
piss art is merging in mind — with thing called — writing-not-writing — PA got way back from sm working the pastiche — writingNotWriting swear said somewhere pessoa and beckett. Though not sure PA will be title in end of whole book -/ maybe for first chapter only — find its pirate and do a whaler on it. Good to be at peace with my damned Pig of the royal moil and boil ie The Negs. Perhaps use subliterate swoons with side of dead — for title? Or perhaps that’s subtitle for Body of hate surface of luv — Thinking thru. Living the dream. In compliance with reality — poetry lives in the allowances — where present tense catches the light/lightning. Yet weaves thru figs and chars. Etc. ✌🏽🧤🍊 #shanemacgowan #nickcave #slavojzizeck #pattismith #claricelispector #sambeckett #fernandopessoa #poguemahone love picture tho — dont know where i got it — played with overlays on top of it
ho jo idiot – doing another doskey the udiot but new char saycrud and still working thru sling of cling. Shd b there now not here — writing whats my line gives greater distance — here goes in for closeness — Virginia says no bring in frm rain — k says everyone has their own fkng rain — clarice says u must try its the only way out for sun one like tous — beck says au fur et a measure. Everyone agrees. Violet says hood luck with that. Rimbaud shows up — says lets condense new paras leave bigger image jumps whats up with that — then says fuck it move on. He did the vanishing — !’nnn’?? Beck yells get back to work — the rim ram rock. Muses fierce reckoning — justapisser make honest women of you — girls all crack up 😂 tears arrive, hiding corner arms around knees -/ combo prudence, nash and yoko 3 headed yeast — meets up penman on sb bridge. Face is time — thats all. Drinks!!!! Salubrious priests. Trove grove pun fun sun burns night light into divisions of remember that word. Shakes says — right up to edge — where la langue buffets time with madness. Pricks kick it kick it in — to battle with #dianaswoods — throws board at beauty — suddenly cant take it any more — then giggles with celia unmercilessly — Unties tippedover murphy who with scribe celestial plots — and hunts it as death as its own — #marcel says — its a compass — beauty slams into real — floating toxic whats under the boot — Ezra starts a poetic rebellion — clowns erupt with off color physical humor — medieval walls secure against sicko phants canna peas — strip poker with EzraTolkienPynchonColette.
Oddly melting the collapsible is tyrannizing with douch contempt run to kirkehuaatd singing the foo la looo — mitty is its vomitous cometous. Feels dense head hard empty density exploding with hostile erection sweet loath verse smelting chomp lumps — the woo fly — pump and swamp. Baudelaire just said exactly. wanda panda my pixie nixie — bottles of dump the dummy the puppet car as go bot warp for leather — tanks for tether – by lilu by -/ #mybluegrotto thirsty terse for sweet truculent wax for my moot hungry bees. farce comes for forcing freedom to lady out of lake the #sublimedonuthole to act — attack attack alack slack hack track back — throw paint at walliez — thirsty wanda wipe the pipe always nightmare melon balls fish and sticks — swim whim limb save the balloon. Dave the balloon. Itching to snipe photo and mix up pix for bunny donnys new cccc tv. Funny honey bunny in a bin. Its all swoon. Hang on bang on swang on. Picture of hurl. Gonna hurl. #poembottom is closer but needs another twist — can see beyond it — know its ugliness clamps against heat the sortie warped by sorrow #clumpsofglue hatred clumps covering head with horror and love a waste case a pisser piss art lurch for meaning and hand me some hand some burning log flog slog hot hotel hoarder rug dug bug of rectile feces -/ excrementals are a hoot. Loot moot soot becketts burdens.and flung slung tug leap — lamping lampshades its fire and cotton collecting under virgils armpits —murph fills paras a mysterious litany of sky lash of prophecy dash and destruction -/ blow up the pipes. Lassssa night swooned mercilessly on feast of car knocks. is murph sordid mmmmm no — no — its rummy grumbly quips of merciless splendor — my dlrty is stanch and restless beyond words. Have fallen into habit of trying start to finish. Talking perfection poem nonsense with scratch and bleed emily. Am i sordid — yes. But swoon with hellish delight struck stupid by the light. Everything i do is for the work — thats one of becketts muses screaming at me. #perfumeaddict #lacanianink #fromstreetswithlove #pissartistsfix
Joy thanks and jokes -/ the writing itself manages to be honest and yet doesnt impugn up heave”l the evil on any one ☝🏼 source(rer)-/ at all — turns out bees very careful in that way — mur allure — sunday at the mines — wirking thru ticklish online — mostly quotes some notes — stole lui and moi from diderot! So lovely — brginning to use for notes on reading. 🧥🧤🕶🌂🥾👻💤😊🥃🧂 desperate to change artwork online feels out of date — to show up like with Victor and yet be there in pt for pres tense— thats all. Can nut count on me for anything more — pt is all am after. Its a test blinking loudly on wall as rover goes over slips wishing well gold fish into the n word no non ne — i always lie about it everywhere else — westies gave me a place to ditch the lies and dig — means more to me : than just about anything — to hear the truth yearning to come out on both sides — was glaring and cruel and unrestricted and yet stolen too as these things are — truth is stolen from shadows lurking the real — for shields — am taking stock. Every one of my craquelure is interesting from a language poetic kinetic perspective and occasionally knocks it, knocks right into It — verse however is not as rim riding or something as narrative — Which worked hard to loosen screws in frankensteins hold head in place neck brace —
Yesterday wrote poem called Head on Bowl // who thinks of writing somewhere between shaving and bulimic — peice called 4th gender ok — both top and bot methinking pubbable — which pieces to send out thats the sock — by eow very possible — today middle #sunilstyles proj / 4 meet up tomorrow — am trying 2bee like that here for this — need to find fig communication thats a drinkers place between bowl and spoon. Its the thirst for it that gets it. Something resists till Abigail has worked through to end of swim cycle? comments really helpful. Curl up and dye — love that — the scheme to leap into swim at 2 for hair weave is a preteressential so might as well use it or lose it. Bad very bad. Writing is gloomy dark forbidding yet pulls toward mann pynch and all the colettes. Who love just as plus much. Its not all about any one thing — that said the singularity got stuffed stuffing itself —shots unt the dark — peaches discovered the wild west then fell the fuck apart. too many hats 🧢 #josefinaayerza #emilydickinsonmuseum #nickcave #slavojzizek #theredhandfiles #dustyhope #claricelispector
No matter how turns body it still itches — writing eye spies for ? cake up of blood in ratios of morose to distilled — beauty bubbles up right underneath it — fill of wasted breadth — always astonished taste for that kind of freedom — burning up on a frozen stretch// writer now calls “my mystery habitat”
Its from fiction that have been developing a modality for essay —- and in essay — often pops out figures and chars — that is to say — for the fiction — thats where confusion comes in. Chars are just beginning to separate — not in alignment yet — 5 milking so far and fascination for it as pronoun toppling is fiercely loose and provokes a kind of bell-fry of collision collusion — gears and skins violetly recombinating — a grove graven slave to the grift — used to kill me — now appears over mountain pass as openings — grave rave oceanic messianic dryad raiding ravages (alas, also bunnies freed by poes lethal cabbages) for very thick and throat of it — So it goes.
2 things happening — first grope “death as“ was onto something — second found it made it better. Third smoothed beyond what was there — found something else. fourth version came in another aspect completely — The thing is — except for lines here and there — first essays are actually quite good — Fact is got two things going on — one at bottom first person — and one at top now a real fictional third — both with figs of speech fully immersed into both pathos and rhyme — and logos — Wanna send 2 of the literary ESSAYS to perfume — because they do — raven after — do crow — do eat up, raid others lit and bottled — for its perfume — Going with the flow —
Did it again got to something could send and it was better even than last sent — but then blew it up — hmmm — black hole beneath it opens playing pancake with sylvia and going in on something with her keening eye a balance between sides of the visionary and have needling insurrection to stay true to “core” -/
#bewaresuddendeath — shimmering hungry mix of mystic and contempt — happy days mudhole — with #bluebellesublime.
Poetic indulgences / with underground man. Creating a pattern to address repetitions — gleaning “shop” whispers re horror, ludicrousness, hysteria — auditors show up — admissions bring in new filters — pulls chars out to surface.
Chapters rising — in sub-cycles — experimental yet pulls thru with repetition — occurs to me as method not unfamiliar to readers of serious postmod fiction. Research continues as well unabated. Habits are good for rabbits.
Strange beautiful and lovely 😊 is always afoot because of time and distance — and working out figuratives -/ and sharing what -/ expands to circumference — of others “spirit” lending hand — is a religious concept called plenum. What plenum later adopted in science as space completely filled/overfilled/measurement of pressure. Math is like taking a bath because la langue connects back to it at various points of — discovery — and Beauty believes that discovery is part Plan It Newfound Land of the Joy — ❤️🔌 New Char thanks to latest rhf = Lady M for Madness — 😋••• bad very bad. Effective Chars tend to their fire places -/ work in true measure appears can evolve spontaneously from there. Up to chap 3 with outline for following 5. 🤏🏽 all workable. Becketts repertoire of repetitions along with mounds of other research etc provides underground man with tons of lob -/ and gob — and agatha — is a major char — for keeping chars in cars etc dials theme attics/addiction into space/movement/taste (for muder) thank wank lucky 🐝🛴🧤🌂 more pricks than kicks — lady m! — ❤️🍑
Starting to gel. Some parts overworked some not worked enough but — bringing in descriptions, explaining vocabulary, Chars are starting to expand into Sets— paragraphs digging thru language for composite of “depths.” Etc
Horizon and Climax. Bit chaotic and bluntly repetitious — seems to be simplifying, layering in, decidedly chipping away at lovely pernicious mutiny of illusions — but what I really like about it — is that it is in pursuit rhetorically of “spaces” in logic as between bbb and clarice. And with concepts from z slipping in and out of la langue — everyone else too as work thru it carefully — and doing it just as a consequence of being here. Joining in.
Climax and The Horizon piece kinda exploded this morning with new ending — opened up specifically to camus and Z and TVW and jj and bbb— bit messy still but — much more fun with a gun.
Living (loving and giving —) at fountain level — admittedly in search of beauty. Even bbb admits it. However fountain du lac, mystifying or circular the intensity it creates. Living is loving — and giving something of yourself — to go for it. Thats all—thats the meaning of my being here.