UNDER CONSTRUCTION for submission. COMPLETELY A DRAFT THIS IS NOT DONE.
It is process of letting go of that thing that calls and calls and calls like a hawk, for violence against lack of virtue, stuff in a sack or shoot em.
But besides that is non avenger who over hellfire brewed in wantons wired up teacup, where like a festering tear at horse mouth, get lost to consumption of muses as beauty crashes bruises performs mayhem of the wily hysteric, horrific and yet stuck like glue to the person inside.
Struck through to heart. There is no difference between me and it.
Hanging out with the girls.
Like its personal and my succumbing tissues of mayhem of feefifo-mail-in runes out in hellots relish for spewing tunes
That are bloody with vengefulness and wet the rise, where ugly buries its soul in rot too deep to unknot
TIME TO OWN its own wretched devises.
Trouble with Violet.
Had to make somehow peace with that, and I had to actualize that peace as being true to time and place.
Present tense got stolen from me.
Because on the other side are Real People. They can fuck with me all they want, as long as they know the truth is also – different.
Now with huff and stuff of skirting kisses to the groin ooof, descending into privilege. Privilege is rights to muse with agenda at hand. Even to go in on the ugly and the sexuality of the language of it. Without cutting back to save my virtue from being a glorious ass.
Gonna work this up into an artifact. As a manifesto? OOOh. So french.
With admission that orig is swept in from cleaners, working off help from for starters somehow. Has to be stated.
The design is complete (everyone is done with me) – suicide and beauty as risk for something beyond politeness
declamatory doesnt announce its ideas lets the viewer (decide). doesnt tell readers what to think.
male demographic by way of the more flesh (but hides for a living and loves from a distance) than not outfit of a viscious – comparisons often fall into manipulations of fluid, falls back into body viscous, and sexual congruences
NOT OUT FIT OF A VIxCIOUS knife lies elsewhere
Offline Consciousness as a Process or Stream – Gonna work this over and send it J.
In looking in upon the mind we must expect to discover then not a thing but a process The thing forever eludes us but the process is always present
–process always present, am lost to mire of its discovery, discovering (what everyone uses for) process by doing this and will let it nurture its own way into the sublime via my digging through poetic loops until some form of humor is found, however entangled in the darkness
Consciousness is like a stream (river of death) which so far as we are concerned with it in a psychological discussion has its rise at the cradle (of death) and its end at the grave (where life begins)
– somewhere along line, turned around great reversal everything backwards – kicks make death my virtue. escapees from bottom of closet of glorious doom makes for a strange kind of pinball love.
It begins with the babes first faint gropings (arising faintly and here still a throng) after light in his new world (which is full of horrors, this is a horror) as he enters it (because molly wants to and I cant say no) and ends with the mans last blind gropings after light in his old world as he leaves it
— my head is full of horror, heart however is yearn to return to sublime. which is classic ontology.
The stream is very narrow (little bird little bird) at first only as wide as the few sensations which come to the babe when it sees the light or hears the sound it grows wider as the mind develops and is at last measured by the grand sum total of lifes experience
Very small except where it isnt.
Summer Slow Cooker
RecipesFig 6 .
Neurones in different stages of development from a to e (not got anywhere near even middle of the alphabet in terms of finishing anything, stuffs all over the place)
In a the elementary cell body alone is present in c a dendrite is shown projecting upward and an axon downward
– Line itself goes down on negative and yet up at projecting for c. For me the levelers and lovers will destroy, because of the chargers – running here for life, running against the horror. And yet walled in by defiance. And stick to my guns anyway –
After DonaldsonFig 1
Trough for Dipping
Here is a little dismaying problem that has virtually made me looseThe loverhu
Everyone here is so different than on Arboria You always said that you can talk through any problem and what people need is friends but nobody here seems to want friends —
– None of my characters say that. death is all I know. because she is a sleepr. Charges and charges and charges until boarded dead. Get stuck inside cycles chewing. And everything he says about this all is true. It is ugly for someone (like me) who cant conform to expectations (in the writing, which owns itself in some precarious way) to do this. And that is its continuity. Its continuity, unwillingness to conform, rakes in the ugly.
Everyone wants to hurt each other all the time Why do people want to hurt one another I dont want to hurt anyone
– Me either.
The one dimensional nature is emphasized by the films pretension of visibility collapse – this is a CONFIRMATION for me. Its pretension of disappearance.
acting a downtrodden and conventionally milquetoast student is AFFLICTED.
—- Not happy at all with me not finishing anything, no one is. On the surface I got nothing.
—- Afflicted by hope which for me, for my kind, who shows promise but dies dies dies, is just that, a gamble, for stakes to the throat. Lets in air for pipe to shove it out from there – aha, a hole!
Lack of Concentration
There are two chief types of inattention whose danger threatens every person First we may be thinking about the right things but not thinking hard enough We lack mental pressure
– vegetables can be violent. Its me too busy protecting you. I suspect now those days are over. but no worries. she is not vicious.
Outside thoughts which have no relation to the subject in hand may not trouble us much but we do not attack our problem with vim —
– Now that I have been incinerated – isnt that enough to allow in the equalizer.
The current in our stream of consciousness is moving too slowly We do not gather up all our mental forces and mass them on the subject before us in a way that means victory —
– victory is the performance of a sentence that balances poetry with onslought of truth.
Our thoughts may be sufficiently focused but they fail to set fire It is like focusing the suns rays while an eclipse is on
-exactly!!!! thats what I am after. THIS IS IMPORTANT
They lack energy
They will not kindle the paper after they have passed through the lens
– he is getting bored with me, and she has no connections
This kind of attention21 means mental dawdling (on your souls) it means inefficiency –never finish anything.
For the individual it means defeat in lifes battles for the nation it means (BEWARE) mediocrity and stagnation
– no worries, fully defeatable. true – stagnation is backed into it, horror doesnt remove
vid Posts 54 What distractions have you observed in the schoolroom tending to break up attention
– And yet I have written tons and tons of this and that tons and tons and tons. Buried inside of which are paras that are splendid, but so what.